Leaving the House

The following meditation was written by Rev. Dr. Bruce Main, President and Founder of Urban Promise Ministries in New Jersey.

“… while it was still dark, Jesus got up and left the house…” Mark 1:35a (New International Version)

“Boil it down,” I pressed. “You’ve invested thousands of dollars and hours of meeting time … what’s the most memorable thing he ever said?”

Startled by the question, my host paused momentarily.

I actually was curious. Retaining an expensive leadership consultant is a luxury I never could afford. Here was a chance to glean good insight on someone else’s dime. Bargains are my love language. 

Given a few uninterrupted hours with a successful real estate developer (who freely operates outside the budgetary constraints of a non-profit leader), I had an opportunity to glean valuable wisdom. For over a decade, this CEO had engaged in the services of a prominent consultant, advising him on everything from complex personnel issues, strategic planning, and intergenerational leadership dynamics.

A memorable nugget of truth I desired.  

“Okay … one day our leadership team gathered for our weekly meeting,” my host reflected. “Now Bruce, you’ve got to understand these are hard-charging, Type-A real estate folk.”  I tried to imagine the scenario. He continued.

“What do you mean?” chuckled the CFO, rolling his eyes. “I pop in my Keurig K-cup, make my espresso, and head to the car.”

“My house is chaotic,” chimed another “My wife gets the kids ready for school. I just slip quietly out the back door.”

“I skim the Wall Street Journal,” added the director of sales. “Jump in my car and turn on sports talk radio.”

For the next 20 minutes, his leaders circled the conference table, sharing their morning routines.

“Here’s what I want you to do,” concluded the consultant. “Before leaving your house in the morning, find your spouse, partner or kids. Take their hand, look at them in the eye, tell them you love them, and hope they have a great day. It’ll change everything.”

Silence blanketed the room. Not the message a bunch of high-octane executive leaders wanted to hear.

“For the next two weeks,” summoned the CEO, breaking the ice. “We’ll put this challenge into practice. No results? We’ll move on.”

Two weeks later the team assembled. “It changed the dynamics of my marriage in a really positive way,” confessed one. “My kids thought it was weird at first, but now they are looking for me before I leave for work,” echoed another. “It reminded me why I go to work each day,” chimed a third. “It helped me focus on what’s really important in life. I treat my colleagues differently.”

Ironically the most consequential truth shared by the consultant had nothing to do with spread sheets, forecasting, or goal setting.  Simple. Start the day with an intention. Take an extra 60 seconds. Connect and express love to those closest to you. 

So I’ve been chewing on this idea for the past few weeks. How do I leave my house in the morning? How do I prepare my heart for what I might encounter during the day?

Reading the Bible recently, I stumbled across this verse. Jumped off the page. “Very early in the morning,” writes the gospel writer Mark. “….while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place where he prayed?”

A few verses later—maybe later that morning—Jesus bumps into a leper on the road. Beautiful is his response. “Filled with compassion,” Mark emphasizes. “Jesus reached out his hand and touched the man …”  The process of healing begins with a compassionate heart.

I’ll be honest, meeting a leper at 8:10 a.m. on a Monday morning is not how I want to start my week.  Lepers were outcasts. Lepers were avoided. Lepers were the untouchables. I’m highly doubtful an abundance of compassion would flow from me.  But Jesus was ready. Dialed in, some might say. 

So it begs the question. Did Jesus respond compassionately because he’s God, and gifted a few extra compassion genes?  Or, as Christian orthodoxy ascribes, Jesus was fully human who “grew in wisdom and stature”—potentially including compassion? 

Like you and me, Jesus left his house each day to meet a complex and demanding world.  Perhaps his early routine of solitude—a few minutes of silence and prayer—opened his compassion spigot, creating a keen sense of attentiveness toward ALL who crossed his path.

Joy,